Those Hard Days of Homeschooling

We are in our fifth year of homeschooling and it has been a profound blessing to our family.

My children and I have learned a lot together--about the world, about our faith, and about ourselves.

Oh, but let me tell you, there are those days.

Today is one such, ahem, *lovely* day, so I thought I'd share a bit with you while everything is fresh in my memory.  (These bad days tend to get flushed out of my short and long-term memories, more as a coping mechanism than anything else, in my opinion!)

Our day started out with me telling my youngest daughter about her recently assigned soccer team.  She melted into a puddle of tears because they want her to show up with a #3 ball, instead of a #4 ball.  "But I had a number three ball last year!!," she sobbed.  I could make out no other coherent words through all of her blubbering, even after I asked why, exactly, this made her so upset. (I am left to assume she thought she was a "big girl" and would move up to a #4 ball this year??)

Awesome. 

Next, we moved on to breakfast.  The same daughter wanted to make a coffee cake--all by herself evidently--so when I was measuring and helping too much (in part because I was navigating a phone call at the same time, and it was easier to measure things myself and hand them to her, instead of instructing her what to do), she began to throw another fit.

"Why doesn't anyone ever LISTEN to me!" she wailed, as she stormed out of the kitchen in tears.

Mercy.

So that is how our morning was set up to start our school day.  It was no surprise when my littlest one started to cry over her spelling work, and when she and her brother began to incessantly bicker over whose book was to be read-aloud by mommy first.

This is real life in our household.  Tantrums.  Frustrations.  Miscommunications.  It can't always be predicted, quantified, rationalized, and it is seldom very pretty, neat, and tidy!

Thankfully, there are days when my children have those "light-bulb" moments, when they are able to see how a mathematical concept comes together, or when they discover they can make something new or express their creativity in a fresh way.

And I find myself blogging and posting about those days the most.  Those are the days I'd like to share and remember!

But it would not be truthful for me, dear friend, to forget to share about all these hard days on this blog!  In the spirit of being authentic and vulnerable, I want to be sure to be faithful to share about all those hard days scattered throughout our school year: those days when the kids' spelling assignments make "no sense" to them, when they whine that their math is toooo long, when they can't read beyond three-letter words (even though last week they were able to read a sentence well!) and they are just frustrated.

And I am frustrated.

But there are a few things I've learned to do to help *reset* difficult days like today.  They are all simple things to do, really, but they are not always easy, especially when I feel my blood pressure rise and I allow myself to enter into the crazy cycle of yelling-and-frustration-and-anger with my children.

The first thing I do is take a moment to pray. These are not lengthy, eloquent prayers, mind you!  These moments are the time when I get out my prayer mantras and put them to work!

The second thing I've learned is that reading aloud can be a powerful reset to any out-of-control  school day.  Sometimes I literally grab whatever is within arms' reach, and begin to read--even over the cacophony of chaos!  I am always surprised how quickly the kids and I soon calm down to listen to a good story or a funny comic strip.

Third (and this is the hardest thing to do of the three!), I take a step back and reassess.  Does this spelling assignment need to be done today?  Will the world end if my child does not understand this math concept right now?  I try to take a look past the three R's of reading, writing, and arithmetic, and try to focus on the fourth R, relationship; the thing that really matters.

(Oh, and last but not least, chocolate solves a lot of problems, too, LOL!  This is a Trim Healthy Mama molten chocolate mug cake I made for myself, before lunch, thank you very much, during the tears and tantrums!  So good and even healthy!)

We all have tough days, dear friend, even though social media and the blogosphere love to focus on all the happy moments in life.  Who doesn't want to focus on only the good times, right?  But I hope this glimpse into our hard days of homeschooling will encourage you in your journey, dear friend!

This life, this gift God has given us as parents of raising our kids, loving them, and discipling them, is definitely a marathon, not a sprint!  It helps to get perspective before the day is done about what really matters.

And if you think of it, pray for us!  We certainly need all the support we can get! 😄